Meeting with Father Bohdan

Fr Bohdan

Fr. Bohdan agreed to meet with me at the Church for a short discussion.  I wanted his guidance something and I also had a question about “my progress as a catechumen.”   

First, as to his guidance: I started out explaining something he already knew. Even though I have only known him for about a year, he knows my connection to Orthodoxy has been for over a decade. Even though I had a desire to convert almost from the very beginning, it was Father Gary who would only consent to it IF my wife gave her support in the matter (unless I felt my very Salvation were at sake, that is.) Well, my wife was not a big fan and, honestly, a part of me was reluctant to move ahead since I knew it would bring a lot of stress to our family life.  So I bided my time and stayed as close to Orthodoxy as I could manage when, as a protestant, I was pretty involved in my protestant church -working with the kids, being a board member, working at the media booth making sure we were livestreaming – which meant I would attend Vespers from time to time and Sunday Divine Liturgy even less than that.  But all the while I was a protestant with my wife, I was Orthodox in my heart.

 

As you know, that changed when my wife began her journey to be Roman Catholic and she insisted that, since I would not be Roman Catholic, that I become Orthodox.

 

My question for Fr. Bohdan: “How do I balance being a good husband and supporting my wife in her journey and remaining faithful to Orthodoxy?”

I wanted to know how to keep my Orthodox identity but at the same time, pray with my wife, even attend Mass with her from time to time.

Fr. Bohdan said it is most important that I pray with her. I should strive for unity with her, as far as I can. I asked about doing “some Catholic things,” like crossing myself with holy water. (Karen put a holy water fixture on our wall.) He explained that these little things (what Catholics call Sacramentals, not to be confused with Sacraments) can be helpful in our  daily walk and help us to keep focused on Christ during our day to day struggles. He explained how, when he was in seminary, he would partake of Holy Water and prosphora (Blessed Bread) daily to help him get through the day.  Basically, I should strive for as much unity with my wife as I can. I was strickly forbidden to receive communion in the Catholic Church, which is something I knew already. I should not “fight” with my wife, trying to force a conversion. That I knew already also. 

.

Holy Water Font my wife bought. Fr. Bohdan he can give me Holy Water so both Karen
and I can cross ourselves when we leave the house. 

There are some on the internet that say I should not even pray with my wife because she is not Orthodox. That, of course, makes no sense to me and my meeting with Fr. Bohdan reinforced that idea.  So, now, as a husband, I need to step up my game and pray with Karen more and help her in her journey to Christ and she helps me.  His advice to me was reassuring.

Now regarding my progress as a catechumen, I admit I was a bit frustrated because I didn’t know about when I would be joined to the Church (i.e., Chrismated.) At the Monday night Catechumen class, it was not discussed what the timeline would be. Thinking about it, that makes sense since, at the class, there are different people in different stages, some of them are very new to Orthodoxy and know very little about it, while, others, like myself, have been hanging around for a while and know a thing or two.  Discussion on when to be brought into the Church is better done on a one to one basis. 

That being said, he believed that I should be Christmated sometime in November so that I could receive the Eucharist during Christmas.  That is great news  (and also terrifying news given I shall have to ready myself to receive the Body and Blood of Christ!) While I thought that I was forgotten, because no timeline had been mentioned to me,  it seems that Fr. Bohdan had this in mind for a while because he mentioned that I would be Christmated with someone else who was ready to enter the Church. (Not gonna mention who right now since I don’t know if they know yet- Fr. Bohdan said that person was going to be baptized while I was to be Christmated. I have to remember to bring in my baptismal certificate from when I was baptized in the Catholic Church.)

It will be on a Saturday sometime in November and Fr. Bohdan mentioned if I wanted to host a little reception afterwards that the Church Hall was available. Maybe I will. Perhaps a cake and some coffee? I’ll think about it.

So, as things become firmed up, I’ll let you all know. 

Keep me in your prayers as I strive to grow close to Christ, His Church and grow closer to my wife.

Bishop Michael visits our Catechumen Class

Bishop Michael visits our Catechumen Class

     When the Bishop visits a Catechumen class, it’s a big deal. Fr. Bodhan made sure that as many as possible would attend that class by constantly reminding us, both by email and in person, that we should be there. We even had pizza which is not the norm in our catechumen class 😊Bishop Michael is an excellent speaker, humble yet obviously well-educated so our “Question and Answer” session was very beneficial.

         We were all sitting down when the Bishop entered the room. We all immediately stood up and Bishop Michael said, “You don’t have to stand” and he went around shaking everyone’s hand.  I wish I had done the whole “Master, Bless” thing with the cupped hand, kissing his right hand but I was taken off guard and shook his hand like the Orthodox armature I am. Some of the more advanced, did it the proper way but most of us catechumens just shook hands.  We sat down, after a prayer for the food, and began with the Pizza and the questions.

     There were questions about the Soul (i.e., what is it?), questions about the Trinity and there was even a question about Toll houses (which seemed to scare the hell out of the questioner - Bishop Michael said the Toll Houses were not to be taken literally but we are to learn that the demons do not want us in Paradise.) There were questions about Confession. Basically, It was Orthodoxy, A to Z and Bishop Michael handled it well. He even promised reading materials about both the Trinity and Toll houses to the questioners.

    

One of the questions was about "Toll Houses" but I don't think it was about the cookies

I myself asked a question about the Western Rite. I asked if the OCA ever considered adopting it, like the Antiochians did.  My reason for asking this is I believe my wife would be more amendable to the Western Rite than the Eastern Rite.  Bishop Michael gave a very good response saying the Western Rite was “contrived” and not organic. And there is really no ONE Western Rite, but they are all different, kind of a hodgepodge of different rites. He even went into the history of OCA citing how the Uniate Church was forced out of the Latin Church -St. Alexis Toth is one of my heroes -so it is understandable how a Western Rite wouldn’t be well received.  What he said made sense, although I still would like to visit a Western Rite Parish sometime. Reader Andrew made an interesting comment on how the ROCOR Church requires that their Western Rite Parishes be on the Old Callender which seems kinda anti-western, don’t you think?

     I wrote an email to Bishop Michael expressing my gratitude for both the visit to the class and for his prayers. In the email, I mention how I actually have met him before back in the summer of 2015. (You can read about that in my blog post Orthodoxy or Bust!: Visit 182 ~ Vespers with a Bishop!) Here is what I said in the email:

Archbishop Michael,

Master, Bless!

I wanted to thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to visit our Catechumen class at the Annunciation Parish in Brick, NJ on Monday, July 13^th.  Your humility and eagerness to connect with both catechumens and inquirers is inspirational.

The class was not the first time we ever spoke together. Fr. Gary actually introduced me to you, when I was just an inquirer, back in the summer of 2015 and we had a brief conversation.  Fr. Gary explained how I wanted to convert but my wife was very opposed (since she was a convinced Protestant) and you asked me her name, which I gave. You then said you would pray for us. Well, those prayers worked and I thank you. My wife, through a series of podcasts, felt led to become a Roman Catholic. When I told her I could not in good conscience do that, she insisted that I become Orthodox so that I would not miss out on the Eucharist. So here I am in as a Catechumen!

I certainly would love your continued prayers for me and my wife Karen. Please know that you are in my prayers.

Thanks, again.

With Respect,

James Vivanco

 

Bishop MIchael

     Bishop Michael wrote me back right away which happily surprised me. I know he is very busy but being the kind shepherd that he is, he made time for one of his newer sheep.  I will not publish what he said here but I will say that he promised to keep me and my wife in his prayers, saying he would add us to his prayer list.  Glory to God!

     The whole night went for about two and a half hours whereas normally Catechumen  class goes just a little over an hour.  None of us complained. Bishop Michael made a joke, towards the end of the night, on how Father Bodhan seemed antsy and wanted to end for the evening so we wrapped it up in prayer and we all went home refreshed, renewed in our love for our Lord, His Church, our Bishop and for Holy Orthodoxy!

     Glory to God!    

The Passing of my brother and What I can do about it!

 

John Thomas Vivanco, With the Saints give rest, O Christ to the soul of your
servant John, where there is no pain, no suffering, no sighing but Life Everlasting. Amen

     I thought when I became a catechumen, I would be blogging all the time, given how excited I was to finally be entering into the Church and my propensity to want to share my journey online. But, I am happy to say, I am far too busy trying to “make myself Orthodox” in a Parish setting to do much blogging about it.  But something happened that I would like to talk about.  As you can guess from the picture above (and the blog post title), my brother passed away (quite unexpectedly) at the age of  60.  He was walking to work and simply collapsed -heart attack.  True, he was a big guy and had diabetes and we siblings always thought he might go first, even though he is the youngest, because of his health issues but it was still a shock to us when it happened.

     Many people can feel powerless in such a situation, that there is nothing we can do to help. In my Protestant years, I would simply have said, “Well, he is gone so there is nothing we can do.” I am happy to say, in Holy Orthodoxy,- and to be fair, in Catholicism as well -   that in our grief there IS something we can do, we can pray. And not just for the friends and family of those left behind but we can pray for the one who has passed.  One of the regrettable outcomes of the Protestant Reformation is an almost complete abandonment of Holy Tradition so that asking for the intercessions of the Saints in heaven or praying for our deceased loved ones is something just isn’t done anymore- if you’re a Protestant.  I wish all Protestants would study early Church history. It would become clear to them that their current “Stripped down” Christianity is devoid of things that were actually quite helpful to the Soul. 

     That is why I am in the process of praying “The Psalter for the Departed.” Basically, it is a reading of the entire book of Psalms, accompanied by specific prayers for the departed.  Now what usually is supposed to happen is people gather together and take turns reading through the Psalms while, I believe, in the presence of the body.  Well, that is not possible, so I have been doing that in the mornings before I go to work.  Right now, I am one third of the way through and I hope to finish before the end of the week.  This practice, besides being a benefit for my departed brother, works out as a source of comfort to me, as only the book of Psalms can be. 

From Ancient Faith Ministries, worth having

     I bought a Psalter from Ancient Faith Ministries which is arranged in the order Monks pray them in the Monastery. The Psalms are divided by Kathismata, twenty sections, each subdivided by three Stasis and specific prayers are said after each Stasis.  Below is the prayers that are used, one for males, the other females.  Also, he is a link to the Kathismata just in case you do not have a Psalter which has it divided like that already.  Liturgics - The Division of the Psalter into Kathismas - Orthodox Church in America

   

    I want to thank all of you who messaged me or commented on my Facebook post, expressing condolences regarding my brother’s passing.  Thank you for those of you who said a prayer for him.  If someone you know has recently died, why don’t you pray “The Psalter for the Departed” for them? It will not only help them but it will help you.

Christ is Risen!

Near the end of Great Lent

 

When Ed Kock was mayor of New York (from 1978 -1989), he had a catch phrase he would scream out whenever he was in front of an audience – “How am I doing?” For the most part, the people of New York answered in the affirmative because he was able to gain the nomination from both the Democratic party and the Republican party- I don’t know if anyone else has ever done that in NYC.   I won’t be asking that question to all of you but I will ask it of myself –

                              “How am I doing this Great Lent?”

I guess it’s a good thing that I haven’t been blogging much during Lent because to be honest, I’ve been very busy and busy with good things.  I have tried to attend as many services as my odd work schedule will allow.  I have been busy with my family, even taking trips with my wife to visit her 98 year old mother who lives around four hours away from us. And in stead of filling up my long commute with audiobooks from Stephen King, Shelby Foote and John Grisham, I have been tuning into Orthodox podcasts by Fr. Thomas Hopko, Fr. Stephen DeYoung and Dr. Jeanne Constantinou.

 

Fr. Bohdan celebrating pre-sanctified liturgy.

As far as prayer goes, I have replaced my normal use of the Faithtree prayer app for morning prayer with the longer form I have with an Orthodox Prayer book I bought years ago from Saint Arseny of Konevets Press which, sadly, no longer exists. In terms of Bible reading, I have been mostly faithful in the daily lectionary selections and I have added the books that Father Hopko recommends be read for Great Lent (Genesis, Isaiah, the Psalms, Proverbs – I may not finish Isaiah before Pascha; it’s a pretty long book! ) I wanted to add the book of Wisdom but I guess I’ll add that next year.

A place you can get lost during Great Lent is fasting.  It is very easy to miss the point entirely and concentrate on what foods are and aren’t allowed.   It is supposed to be about limiting portions so as to crucify the flesh . It is supposed to be about taking your money that you saved by fasting and giving it to the poor.  It’s about denying yourself and picking up the Cross.  While I have been faithful in the “restrictions” of what can be eaten, I haven’t been doing well with portion control.  I ask myself what is the point of just eating rice and beans if I eat too much of it? I find myself snacking way too much on “Great Lent approved foods” when I should be content with the food I eat just at meal times. 

The great things about Orthodoxy is it is about daily repentance. While in my Evangelical days, I was content with a “one and done” approach to Salvation, in the Church I can come to Christ daily, tell him my sins (which He knows already) and ask for His help and help from the Saints.  I pray the Lord gives me many years so I can get Lent right. Of course the way things go in Orthodoxy, I should always consider myself the chief of sinners so I will never truly “get it right.” And when I think I have, it will be a sure sign that I haven’t! 

I am looking forward to Pascha and not just so I can have pizza again but Great Lent has helped me so far in keeping my focus on Christ and His Church. Speaking of His Church, it has been a joy to get to know the young Catechumens and inquirers who are part of this parish. They are inquisitive, joyful and open to God in a way that inspirers me to daily seek Christ. 

May you all finish the course well during the Fast and may you experience the Resurrection of Christ in a new way this Pascha!

Christ is Risen!

Clean Monday....Clean Week....Time to get Clean!

     

Is this how you get ready for Clean Week?

     I wouldn’t use the phrase, “The show must go on,” but I will say that, despite really poor weather conditions, “The Divine Services will be celebrated!” It was really snowy and windy Sunday into Monday Morning so we received an email from Fr. Bohdan saying that even though the weather was “challenging” we would be having service that night:

     And, yes, the weather was bad. I spent Monday morning with my wife and two sons, digging out my wife’s car so she could go to work. (She works at the hospital and they don’t take “weather” as an excuse for absense 😊) She went to work  and I spent the rest of the day digging out my car and making sure the driveway was clear. 

     Later that afternoon, I looked at the roads and decided I would venture out into the snowy abyss.  I gave myself extra time to travel to Church but, me being me, first, I had to create an A.I. video showing how I combatted the snow. Here it is for your viewing pleasure 😊

Getting to Church by all means necessary!

     I arrived early and I am so happy that I did. Yes, we were a small group (I think I counted 10 or 11 by evening’s end) but to pray  the Canon of St. Andrew in person was so much more beneficial than doing it online. (which, thank God, was avialable for those who could not get out of their driveways.) St. Andrew of Crete was certainly a poet and, for those who say that the Orthodox Church does not “preach the Bible”- a claim made by Evangelicals I have encountered- all the text of the Canon were illusions to blbilical scenes and characters. St. Andrew directs your mind and soul to the bible and, through it, the Holy Spirit can convict and move you towards Christ. Totally beautiful.

Fr. Bohdan on Clean Monday

     Clean Week, means daily services but, sadly, I could only attend Monday’s service because of my work schedule.  But, every morning during Clean Week I read/prayed the Canon of St. Andrew with a copy I had purchased latst year, so, even though I wasn’t with my parish, I could participate to the best of my ability. 

     Clean Week is done and I look forward to the Sunday of Orthodoxy this weekend.  There is going to be a procession of the Icons done by the youth of our parish and that should be a blessing.  I’ll try and snap some pictures.

     As Great Lent goes on, I have to get a handle on Fasting.  I did make food  purchases that will help me this week at work but I wonder if there is anyting except rice and beans for lunch and oatmeal for breakfast?  I think I’ll talk to some fellow parishioners this Sunday at coffee hour. 

     In the meantime, I have swapped out listening to audiobooks  to listening to Ancient Faith Radio teaching Podcasts (Fr. Hopko and Fr. Stephen DeYoung are favoirtes.) I guess I’ll finish Stephen King’s Dark Tower series sometime after Pascha. May God give you Strength during this time. 

     Keep me in your prayers as I remember you!

Forgiveness Vespers and saying Good bye to Father Gary

 

Father Gary and me at his last coffee hour. You can read below why I am smirking

     The last time attended a Forgiveness Vespers was in 2017 (You can read about that  HERE) I especially wanted to make sure I made it this year, not only because I am now a Catechumen and this is “my Church” now but also because it was the last liturgy that Fr. Gary would be celebrating as our Pastor before he retires.  It is a beautiful service and I admit I did feel awkward at first because of all the bowing and “Triple Fake Air Kisses” but it winds up being a humbling and moving experience.  At the end of all the prayers, everyone forms a line and stands before Fr. Gary. He asks us for forgiveness and that is when we bow and do the “Fake Triple Air Kiss.” As I was standing in line, waiting for my turn, I couldn’t remember what you were supposed to say. Luckily, Halle James, my fellow catechumen, was in front of me and I asked her. She said the proper phrase was “God forgives and I forgive."

 

an example from Instagram what Forgiveness Vespers looks like

     It quickly became emotional because, Matushka Mary was crying. This would be her last service with the parish she’s been a member of for over twenty years. After we forgave each other, she gave me a big hug and said how happy she was for me that I was finally entering the Church. 

     I took notice of one man, who was there with his children, and he reminded me that, in Orthodoxy, although there are many traditions and (sometimes odd things to the Western mind) of doing things, Orthodoxy does not force a person to do things they are uncomfortable with.  For example, in Orthodoxy, you venerate an Icon by bowing and kissing the Icon but there are some people who will only bow. The man I spoke of, participated in the “Forgiveness Circle” but, instead of doing the “Fake Triple Air Kiss,” which really amounted to a hug, he shook people's hands and offered words of forgiveness. He was able to fully participate in the service but do so in the way he was comfortable with.  Many people in his position would have simply left before all the hugging started but, good for this man for participating. He certainly is a fine example to his children who were standing next to him. 

     The coffee hour followed and everyone got a chance to say goodbye to Father Gary and Matushka Mary. At one point, Father Gary came and sat next to me and we chatted a bit. He asked me about my wife’s journey, and I told him how she is really becoming alive in her faith and I gave an example of how she was relating to me that she was deeply moved when she read about the Apostle Jude and all his sufferings, all for the sake of Christ and proclaiming His Word.  I know I would love for Karen to be Orthodox (and she would love for me to be Catholic) but, for now, we are both happy that we are progressing towards Christ. 

     As we were talking, Chris, the choir director, made an announcement that the choir would like to sing some hymns in honor of Father Gary.  They started singing and it was , of course, beautiful. 

     Before I left to go home, I thanked Father Gary for all his Pastoral care over the years and he agreed to take a “selfie” with me. (Pictured above) the reason I had a smirk on my face was Father Gary asked as I took the picture, if I was going to turn this into some A.I. video- apparently, he has seen some of my rather silly work on Facebook.

     I gave a hug to Matushka Mary and she said she and her husband would try to come down for when I am baptized.  (although I think Bishop Michael will want me to be Christmated instead- but I’ll do whatever) We parted laughing because I referenced the time she joked with me, when I was very new to Orthodoxy that, I was sitting in the wrong place- reserved for Priests and their wives. You can read about that HERE

     There is supposed to be a major storm coming Sunday night into Monday, so it is up in the Air if the “Canon of St. Andrew” will be served on Monday.  If it is, I’ll see if I can give you my reflections in the form of another blog post.

      In the meantime, Happy Lent everyone! May we keep the Fast!

And So it Begins.....Becoming a Catechumen!

 

                           

As Father Gary said at the end of the Liturgy, "This isn't the first step towards being received into the Orthodox Church, but it is an important step." Today, along with Halle James who I met last night after Saturday night Vespers, I became a Catechumen in the Holy Orthodox Church.  This whole journey started years ago when I was exploring my Catholic roots, looking for something "deeper" than my affiliation with Evangelicalism.  I discovered Catholicsim on the internet (Shout out to Fr Roderick Vonhogen of the old Daily Breakfast podcast) which led me to other Catholic podcasts. On my particular one, I believe it was called "Techno Priest" (I can't be sure; it was back in 2008), that priest interviewed Fr. Peter Preble, who at the time had the Shepherd of Souls podcast, which was my first encounter with an Eastern Orthodox Podcast.  That reminded me that, at one time, I would visit an Eastern Orthodox Liturgy at the Base Chapel when I was in the Air Force back in 1980 (Chaplain Pelesh was the Orthodox Chaplain then and a really great guy, down to earth!) I had forgotten all about Orthodoxy and, at the time, I really didn't understand it. I just saw it as a weird Catholic offshoot.  

All this led me to Ancient Faith Radio and that changed my life.

Ancient Faith Home | Ancient Faith Ministries

After a while of listening (and learning) I got the nerve to visit an Orthodox Parish.  I was going to go to a Greek Parish, which was closest to me but a phone call to the Priest let me know that most of the liturgy was in Greek.  That didn't help me at all so I ventured to the OCA parish which I now attend and to which I hope to be united in communion as soon as God wills.  

My wife came to the parish (It was her first time) so she could witness me becoming a catechumen.  I knew she would like some of it (She remarked how the choir was beautiful (Shout out to Chris, our choir director! ☺) But I knew that the kissing of the Icons and all that bowing would be foreign to her (as it was to me when I first attended) But she was very happy for me and I am glad she was there. She could sense I was nervous and in her own way told me to calm down ("Jim, you're stressing me out!") God bless my wife!

 Here is a video of the ceremony (for lack of a better word) which Shana, whom I just met, filmed it.  (Quick note on how God cares about the little things in our life. Shana (not sure if I'm spelling her name right) told me normally she stands on the other side of the Nave but, someone else was in that spot so she was forced to be where she was which proved better because, she would not have been able to get me in the picture if she stood where she normally did.) 

After the service Fr. Gary welcomed me and Halle James as Catechumens and sang "Many Years" for us. Fr. Gary marks special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries with the singing of "Many Years" at the end of the Liturgy. Here is a video of that which concludes with me venerating the Cross.

I will be checking in from time to time, to let you know how my journey is going. Please keep me in your prayers. 

Making the Announcements/Seeing Orthodox Movies

 

Fr Bohdan making announcements

After all these years, it seems a little surreal that I am finally becoming Orthodox. But it has moved from the realm of wishing to becoming a reality. I even made the announcements in the bulletin.  Fr. Gary is away until next week so Fr. Bohdan Chaikivskyi (whose name I admit I cannot pronounce.) celebrated the Divine Liturgy and after the liturgy, Fr. Bohdan made the announcements.  Here is a video of him mentioning how I and someone else will be received as catechumens next week:

And here is how it looked in the Bulletin:

THIS SUNDAY, February 8 – Prior to the Divine Liturgy, James Vivanco and Halle James will be received into the catechumenate. May God continue to guide their journeys into the Orthodox Faith!

So, Next Sunday it is, then! I will be going to Vespers Saturday night so that I can speak with Fr. Gary to find out the specifics of what I am to do, ect.  Since I have never been received as a Catechumen before, I don't know what to do.  😁 I am happy that my wife will be witnessing the event. She will stop by before she goes to Mass.  

Moving Forward - Snowstorm prevented my attendance at my scheduled last Protestant Service.

A.I. Jimmy in the Snowstorm

Last Sunday would have been my last Sunday at my Protestant parish but the Pastor Cancelled the Service due to a bad snowstorm.  (Side note: My Orthodox Parish was open for business; must be those hardy Russian roots ☺) So instead of attending the protestant service, I helped them by editing an old service from YouTube-I took out the irrelevant announcements- and re-posting so they could "worship" together.  I guess that is my last act of service for the Protestants, at least as it pertains to Sunday Morning Worship. I checked the Stats and 76 of them did watch the service so my work wasn't for nothing.  Why didn't I go to the Orthodox Liturgy if the Church was open? I guess I am not as hardy as those Russians yet.  The Snowstorm was pretty bad.

I spent the morning typing up the attendance sheets for February so that the next Sunday School Superintendent can have an easy transition.  I will offer to help that person in telling them how I "do the Stats" if they want me to. (They chose a new Sunday School Superintendent in February) Perhaps, they will develop their own system. I know I needed the help when I took over the job. My friend James used to do it and he used the excel program.  I am not that proficient in that program, so I developed my own system. 

This Sunday is my first Sunday at the Orthodox Church, leaving the past behind.  I will have one week as "an inquirer," and then the next week, Fr. Gary receives me as a catechumen. It has been harder to leave protestant parish, -more than I realized. I think that is why I gave myself a transition period. But, my mind is now focused on starting life as an Orthodox Christian.  In my prayer rule for years, I would mention several Saints and ask them 

'"Lead me unto Christ and unto Holy Orthodoxy." 

I said this prayer for years, asking St. James, the brother of the Lord, St. Moses the Black, St. Herman of Alaska, St, Mary of Egypt. St. James the Faster.- I asked these Saints for Prayer because when I first inquired into Orthodoxy (more than a decade ago,) these Saints stood out to me as an example- I love their stories - I am grateful that after all these years, my prayers have been answered.  

To help me in my way back to Orthodoxy, I have decided to relisten to all of Fr. Thomas Hopko's podcast "Speaking the Truth in Love," on Ancient Faith Radio. There are over 250 episodes so that should keep me busy for a while. I am very grateful to AFR for all their podcasts; they are the reason I got the courage to walk into my parish.  One day, I'll do a blog post about AFR and go into detail on how they changed my life.

Speaking the Truth in Love | Ancient Faith Ministries

Well, that's it for now. Thanks for reading and keep me in your prayers. Hey, Great Lent is coming up....that should be fun!

Wrapping things up.

 

                                           

                 

click here to watch 10 seconds of nonsense!

    

January 25th will be my last Sunday in the Nazarene church. I bet some hard-core Orthodox will think I should just "cut and run" as soon as I can. After all, they'd say, you found the Church; why would you wait any longer than you have to? Well, to be honest, I think it will help me to process my loss. Yes, it is a loss! I have been going to this church for over 30 years and have made very good friends. We were (and are) a group of people who sincerely love Jesus, who struggled together, who watched each other's kids grow up and leaving that will take some getting used to.  I know what I will be getting is beyond compare. To be united to Christ in the Eucharist, to pray with the faithful, asking for the intercession of the Saints, to hear the words of the early Church Fathers is something that is beyond compare. But, I am still leaving something good behind so allow me to mourn for that, if you please.

My first Sunday at the Orthodox Parish will be February1st but i have to finish up some paper work as Sunday School Superintendent and get it ready for the mid-February Board meeting which I will not be attending.  Some of things the Nazarene church will have to figure out is if they will live-stream the second service since I won't be doing it anymore. Right now, my friend James live-streams the first service so maybe they will just leave it at that. Also, I am the one who takes the video service and turns it into an audio podcast for distribution on Libsyn.com.  I wonder if that will continue with someone else.  I also manage their Facebook page and Facebook group but will, obviously do so no longer.

One of the projects I work with Pastor Del on is his weekly video devotion which is published on Sunday evenings.  He decided to call it "Sunday Vespers" (A name I wouldn't have chosen since Vespers is a prayer service) but, he's the boss so he gets to pick the title.  As of this posting he is in a series on the Psalms where he reads portions of a Psalm and comments.  Many people find this encouraging, so I am sorry to have to leave it.  Maybe someone else can continue with it. I have told him that we will continue until he finishes up the Psalms.  (He is up to Psalm 97 right now) but once that is done, then that will end my official ties to the Nazarene church. 

A sample video of Pastor Del doing "Sunday Vespers."

I have been emailing Fr. Gary and he says that I will be received as a Catechumen on February 8. There will be a short service before the Divine Liturgy where I (and someone else apparently) will have the prayers of the Catechumens said over us.  I guess that will make me an Official Orthodox-wanna-be and that point.  I wonder how long it'll take till I am Chrismated?  I guess I'll find out from the new priest.

Oh, I forgot to mention, - I learned on Epiphany when I went to the service that Fr. Gary will be retiring and come next month a new priest will be assigned by Bishop Michael.  May God grant many years to Fr. Gary and his wife Matushka Mary. I thank God for them both and I am glad that Fr. Gary will be the one to make me a Catechumen. 

Fr. Gary and Matushaka Mary on vacation. 
Yes, even Priests get to take vacations.

So there you have it.  Keep me in your prayers.

 

Two Difficult Mondays

Pastor Del

My wife and I met with Pastor Del on a Monday Morning. To say we were a bit nervous would be an understatement.  The man we were going to speak to was our Pastor for over thirty years. He has helped me personally through some hardships (brought on by my own stupidity) and did so with Grace, Compassion and the Love of Christ.  He loved us and all his parishioners, and we were about to tell him that we were leaving.

It was my wife who started us on this present course, so she is the one who spoke.  I did not interrupt with my own thoughts; instead, I let her tell her story.  She recounted to Pastor Del how lately she felt drawn to the Catholic Church, loving the beauty of its liturgy and how she had a longing for the Eucharist.  Pastor remarked, regarding the beauty of worship, how he thought “we have that here” and we did not comment what we were thinking that there is no comparison to Liturgy and to what takes place among these God fearing Christians. No doubt, it is sincere from their hearts but it cannot compare to liturgical worship.  Pastor Del went on to say, “You know, the Catholics believe the Eucharist is the actual body and Blood of Jesus, do you believe that?” She said “yes” and I could see on his face that he was surprised. 

He then moved on to me.

“So, Jim, where do you stand in all of this?”

I reminded him about our meeting  back in 2011 – I didn’t expect him to remember the details; the only reason I remembered is because I blogged about them here and re-read them before our meeting this day- I said that I had met with him then and talked to him about my desire to join the Orthodox Church but was prevented from it by the wise counsel of  Fr. Gary who said that if my wife wasn’t on board to stay where I am.  That has changed, I told him, my wife now understood the importance of receiving the Eucharist and encouraged me to do so.

When I got to that point, Pastor Del interrupted me and said, “Are you telling me that you are both leaving the church?”

We both said, “Yes.”

He said, “You’ll have to excuse me a moment.” He then stood up, walked out the door.  He was actually gone a few minutes and my wife and I sat in awkward silence.  I resisted the impulse to fill the silence with an attempt at a witty remark and I am glad I kept silent.

He came back, apologized for leaving and said he been praying.  He told us he believed it would be a mistake to leave. This is where God brought you guys, he said, and we shouldn’t leave.  Our response showed him that we were resolute in our decision. He made a remark about the Eucharist and how it’s done in this church (to be honest I don’t’ remember the specifics of what he said) but I countered that there really was a difference between the Nazarene church and the Catholic /Orthodox view of things. He cut me off saying it was no use arguing about theology (or something to that effect.) I could see he really didn’t want to talk theology which, is a shame, because that was the reason we were leaving.  He then told us we would always have a home here, that he would always consider himself our pastor.

 He concluded this hard meeting by praying for us.  As soon as he said “amen,” I offered my own pray, thanking God for this godly man and the things I learned from him. I specifically mentioned how our board meetings were a spiritual affair; we started in prayer which lasted at least a half hour. I said I was grateful for the good example that set.

We ended the meeting with a hug and he said it would take a while for him to get over this.  Karen told me later, with a smile, that after he prayed, she was going to cross herself but thought that might put the poor over the edge.

Some church board meetings resembled the picture above. Thankfully, 
that was not the case for our church. We led and finished with prayer.

The following Monday was board meeting. As Sunday School Superintendent, I was a member of the board so I thought I should go.  I figured  this would be my last board meeting. Pastor had asked me in our Monday meeting if he wanted me to tell the board or should he. I said, he could do it. (I thought I might get too choked up to do it.) For some reason, I had thought he would announce it at the end of the meeting or, make it a topic on the agenda.  Instead, after sharing a scripture and before we began our time of prayer, he announced that Karen and I would be leaving the church.  He said the reason was that Karen believed that the Eucharist was the literal Body and Blood of Christ. I sort of interrupted him and said, “Well, there’s more to it than that.”  Pastor replied that seems to be the main point of what she said. In a sense, he’s right. In our meeting, Karen held  back a bit, not mentioning how the church services had not been something she could become engaged in and thus found it hard to worship (and for some other reasons I won’t get into) and that the Liturgy really helped center her thoughts on Christ but she hadn’t mentioned it because she thought he would take it personally as a slight against him.  So her views on the Eucharist seemed to be the only reason we were leaving.

I went on to say that while Karen was going to be Catholic, I was going to become Orthodox. I, almost jokingly said, “If you want to know more, you can read my blog.” A board member named Ted spoke up.(He has an amazing story on how God literally saved him after a horrible traffic accident…. I might share that here sometime in the future, if Ted allows.) Ted said, “Wait a minute- You and Karen will be going to different Churches? No offense, but that’s a red flag to me.”  It was a surprise to both Karen and I that Pastor Del did not bring up this very point during our meeting. I think it is because he was so shocked by the news of us leaving and quite upset by it that the thought didn’t enter his mind.  I answered Ted that the Catholics have many Masses in one day while the Orthodox only celebrate the Liturgy once on a Sunday so Karen and I can go to a later Mass together.  I know some hard core Orthodox may object to me attending a heterodox service, but this is something I discussed with Father Gary.  He says (and I quite agree) that sometimes attending a service with a loved one is an act of love towards that person.  I assured Fr. Gary that I would not be receiving communion at the Mass.  Our going to separate Churches is a cause of concern to myself and Karen but we have discussed it and will continue to share our spiritual lives with each other, praying together and encouraging each other.

After this short discussion, we began our time of prayer at the board meeting. Our habit is to go around the room with each board member praying out loud and Pastor Del would always conclude the prayer.  As I said, this would take at least a half hour and it made for very unified and calm board meetings.  I was touched by the many prayers for Karen and I with some even weeping because of our departure. 

We concluded the pray and went on to attend to the business of the church. 

I must say it was a difficult night but I truly am touched by the love and concern of all these people for us.  We have been friends and fellow servants of Christ for over thirty years and saying good-bye is not easy.  But I know God has great things in store for me and my wife as we continue on our journey.

Keep us in your prayers.

 

 

 

Breakfast with Fr. Gary

a Cozy place for a meeting with a priest

 Now my wife becoming Catholic will not be a quick affair.  OCAI (Order of Christian Initiation for Adults) will be a year-long process. OCAI will probably start sometimes in the fall. (Despite the publication date of this post, in "real time" when I am writing this, it is actually a week before Christmas.) That means she won't be Catholic until Easter of 2027 so she sees no reason to rush to speak our Pastor. 

I, however, wanted to not wait that long.  You see, attending Mass with my wife helped me put my protestant parish is sharp contrast to Liturgical Worship.  As much as I love the people in my protestant parish, I do not find it easy to participate in the worship service.  The songs are too emotional and, sorry to say, vapid (at least to me, anyway) - my boredom in the service is what prompted me to get involved in the "production" end of the service. That is, I operate the Video camera for the Livestream.  I fear that years of doing this has made me quite complacent in my spiritual life.  But attending Mass with my wife has reawakened my yearning for Eucharistic centered Worship and I want to become a member of the Orthodox Church sooner rather than later.

That means a sit down with my Pastor to explain what is going on. I offered to talk to Pastor Del on my own and speak for the both of us but Karen rightly said that Pastor Del has been our Pastor for over 30 years and deserves a face-to-face conversation.  So we decided we will make an appointment with him after Christmas. 

In the meantime, I wanted to speak with Father Gary to let him know what is going on. I knew that Father Gary was on Vacation, so I thought I ought to reach out to him to request an appointment for when he came back.  All this happened right before Thanksgiving, in the midst of the Nativity Fast so I wrote the following in an email to him:  

Father Gary responded quickly with this witty reply:

Hardy, Har, Har! I love a priest with a good sense of humor.  (And, no, I had real turkey on Thanksgiving:) ) To show what good shepherd Father Gary is, basically, as soon as he returned from Vacation, he didn't wait for me to contact him but rather shot me an email asking when we could meet. I recommended IHOP but he thought a place recommended by one of his parishoners was a better place to go. Sandy's Cafe turned out to be a cozier place.  

I like the small town vibe of this place

We sat down and Fr. Gary ordered a plain everything Bagel, toasted and dry and a black coffee. Even though I wasn't keeping the fast, I ordered a tea with honey and an English muffin with jelly.  I told Fr. Gary the reason I suggested IHOP was because that is where we first met to discuss my longing to enter into the Church.  (See Orthodoxy or Bust!: Breakfast in the morning ~ 35th visit in the evening! to read about that meeting) I told him about my wife's journey and her pull to Catholicism.  I then mentioned that she had said if I wasn't going to convert to Catholicism then I needed to become Orthodox because, how could I live without the Eucharist? This, of course, was a drastic change from my last meeting where I honestly had to say my wife was not on board with me becoming Orthodox.  Fr. Gary went on to say he wasn't surprised how the Holy Spirit worked in the lives of people since he's seen it all the time. He went on to say that my period as being a catechumen wouldn't have to be a long time, especially since I have been attending the parish, off and on since Pentecost Vespers in 2010. I told him I knew a lot of the doctrine of the Church but needed to learn how to live the day-to-day life of an Orthodox Christian.  He said it would be good for me to go through Great Lent before I was received into the Church.  

So all that remains is for my wife and I to sit down with our Pastor and explain to him how we have to leave the church.  I know it will not be an easy meeting. He has been our Pastor for 31 years and he has always been a faithful witness to the Love of Christ, exemplifying God's love in his words and actions.  But I am not sure he'll understand and know he will be very upset.  Lord, have mercy!

Of your charity, keep us in your prayers.