The Passing of my brother and What I can do about it!

 

John Thomas Vivanco, With the Saints give rest, O Christ to the soul of your
servant John, where there is no pain, no suffering, no sighing but Life Everlasting. Amen

     I thought when I became a catechumen, I would be blogging all the time, given how excited I was to finally be entering into the Church and my propensity to want to share my journey online. But, I am happy to say, I am far too busy trying to “make myself Orthodox” in a Parish setting to do much blogging about it.  But something happened that I would like to talk about.  As you can guess from the picture above (and the blog post title), my brother passed away (quite unexpectedly) at the age of  60.  He was walking to work and simply collapsed -heart attack.  True, he was a big guy and had diabetes and we siblings always thought he might go first, even though he is the youngest, because of his health issues but it was still a shock to us when it happened.

     Many people can feel powerless in such a situation, that there is nothing we can do to help. In my Protestant years, I would simply have said, “Well, he is gone so there is nothing we can do.” I am happy to say, in Holy Orthodoxy,- and to be fair, in Catholicism as well -   that in our grief there IS something we can do, we can pray. And not just for the friends and family of those left behind but we can pray for the one who has passed.  One of the regrettable outcomes of the Protestant Reformation is an almost complete abandonment of Holy Tradition so that asking for the intercessions of the Saints in heaven or praying for our deceased loved ones is something just isn’t done anymore- if you’re a Protestant.  I wish all Protestants would study early Church history. It would become clear to them that their current “Stripped down” Christianity is devoid of things that were actually quite helpful to the Soul. 

     That is why I am in the process of praying “The Psalter for the Departed.” Basically, it is a reading of the entire book of Psalms, accompanied by specific prayers for the departed.  Now what usually is supposed to happen is people gather together and take turns reading through the Psalms while, I believe, in the presence of the body.  Well, that is not possible, so I have been doing that in the mornings before I go to work.  Right now, I am one third of the way through and I hope to finish before the end of the week.  This practice, besides being a benefit for my departed brother, works out as a source of comfort to me, as only the book of Psalms can be. 

From Ancient Faith Ministries, worth having

     I bought a Psalter from Ancient Faith Ministries which is arranged in the order Monks pray them in the Monastery. The Psalms are divided by Kathismata, twenty sections, each subdivided by three Stasis and specific prayers are said after each Stasis.  Below is the prayers that are used, one for males, the other females.  Also, he is a link to the Kathismata just in case you do not have a Psalter which has it divided like that already.  Liturgics - The Division of the Psalter into Kathismas - Orthodox Church in America

   

    I want to thank all of you who messaged me or commented on my Facebook post, expressing condolences regarding my brother’s passing.  Thank you for those of you who said a prayer for him.  If someone you know has recently died, why don’t you pray “The Psalter for the Departed” for them? It will not only help them but it will help you.

Christ is Risen!

Near the end of Great Lent

 

When Ed Kock was mayor of New York (from 1978 -1989), he had a catch phrase he would scream out whenever he was in front of an audience – “How am I doing?” For the most part, the people of New York answered in the affirmative because he was able to gain the nomination from both the Democratic party and the Republican party- I don’t know if anyone else has ever done that in NYC.   I won’t be asking that question to all of you but I will ask it of myself –

                              “How am I doing this Great Lent?”

I guess it’s a good thing that I haven’t been blogging much during Lent because to be honest, I’ve been very busy and busy with good things.  I have tried to attend as many services as my odd work schedule will allow.  I have been busy with my family, even taking trips with my wife to visit her 98 year old mother who lives around four hours away from us. And in stead of filling up my long commute with audiobooks from Stephen King, Shelby Foote and John Grisham, I have been tuning into Orthodox podcasts by Fr. Thomas Hopko, Fr. Stephen DeYoung and Dr. Jeanne Constantinou.

 

Fr. Bohdan celebrating pre-sanctified liturgy.

As far as prayer goes, I have replaced my normal use of the Faithtree prayer app for morning prayer with the longer form I have with an Orthodox Prayer book I bought years ago from Saint Arseny of Konevets Press which, sadly, no longer exists. In terms of Bible reading, I have been mostly faithful in the daily lectionary selections and I have added the books that Father Hopko recommends be read for Great Lent (Genesis, Isaiah, the Psalms, Proverbs – I may not finish Isaiah before Pascha; it’s a pretty long book! ) I wanted to add the book of Wisdom but I guess I’ll add that next year.

A place you can get lost during Great Lent is fasting.  It is very easy to miss the point entirely and concentrate on what foods are and aren’t allowed.   It is supposed to be about limiting portions so as to crucify the flesh . It is supposed to be about taking your money that you saved by fasting and giving it to the poor.  It’s about denying yourself and picking up the Cross.  While I have been faithful in the “restrictions” of what can be eaten, I haven’t been doing well with portion control.  I ask myself what is the point of just eating rice and beans if I eat too much of it? I find myself snacking way too much on “Great Lent approved foods” when I should be content with the food I eat just at meal times. 

The great things about Orthodoxy is it is about daily repentance. While in my Evangelical days, I was content with a “one and done” approach to Salvation, in the Church I can come to Christ daily, tell him my sins (which He knows already) and ask for His help and help from the Saints.  I pray the Lord gives me many years so I can get Lent right. Of course the way things go in Orthodoxy, I should always consider myself the chief of sinners so I will never truly “get it right.” And when I think I have, it will be a sure sign that I haven’t! 

I am looking forward to Pascha and not just so I can have pizza again but Great Lent has helped me so far in keeping my focus on Christ and His Church. Speaking of His Church, it has been a joy to get to know the young Catechumens and inquirers who are part of this parish. They are inquisitive, joyful and open to God in a way that inspirers me to daily seek Christ. 

May you all finish the course well during the Fast and may you experience the Resurrection of Christ in a new way this Pascha!

Christ is Risen!

Clean Monday....Clean Week....Time to get Clean!

     

Is this how you get ready for Clean Week?

     I wouldn’t use the phrase, “The show must go on,” but I will say that, despite really poor weather conditions, “The Divine Services will be celebrated!” It was really snowy and windy Sunday into Monday Morning so we received an email from Fr. Bohdan saying that even though the weather was “challenging” we would be having service that night:

     And, yes, the weather was bad. I spent Monday morning with my wife and two sons, digging out my wife’s car so she could go to work. (She works at the hospital and they don’t take “weather” as an excuse for absense 😊) She went to work  and I spent the rest of the day digging out my car and making sure the driveway was clear. 

     Later that afternoon, I looked at the roads and decided I would venture out into the snowy abyss.  I gave myself extra time to travel to Church but, me being me, first, I had to create an A.I. video showing how I combatted the snow. Here it is for your viewing pleasure 😊

Getting to Church by all means necessary!

     I arrived early and I am so happy that I did. Yes, we were a small group (I think I counted 10 or 11 by evening’s end) but to pray  the Canon of St. Andrew in person was so much more beneficial than doing it online. (which, thank God, was avialable for those who could not get out of their driveways.) St. Andrew of Crete was certainly a poet and, for those who say that the Orthodox Church does not “preach the Bible”- a claim made by Evangelicals I have encountered- all the text of the Canon were illusions to blbilical scenes and characters. St. Andrew directs your mind and soul to the bible and, through it, the Holy Spirit can convict and move you towards Christ. Totally beautiful.

Fr. Bohdan on Clean Monday

     Clean Week, means daily services but, sadly, I could only attend Monday’s service because of my work schedule.  But, every morning during Clean Week I read/prayed the Canon of St. Andrew with a copy I had purchased latst year, so, even though I wasn’t with my parish, I could participate to the best of my ability. 

     Clean Week is done and I look forward to the Sunday of Orthodoxy this weekend.  There is going to be a procession of the Icons done by the youth of our parish and that should be a blessing.  I’ll try and snap some pictures.

     As Great Lent goes on, I have to get a handle on Fasting.  I did make food  purchases that will help me this week at work but I wonder if there is anyting except rice and beans for lunch and oatmeal for breakfast?  I think I’ll talk to some fellow parishioners this Sunday at coffee hour. 

     In the meantime, I have swapped out listening to audiobooks  to listening to Ancient Faith Radio teaching Podcasts (Fr. Hopko and Fr. Stephen DeYoung are favoirtes.) I guess I’ll finish Stephen King’s Dark Tower series sometime after Pascha. May God give you Strength during this time. 

     Keep me in your prayers as I remember you!

Forgiveness Vespers and saying Good bye to Father Gary

 

Father Gary and me at his last coffee hour. You can read below why I am smirking

     The last time attended a Forgiveness Vespers was in 2017 (You can read about that  HERE) I especially wanted to make sure I made it this year, not only because I am now a Catechumen and this is “my Church” now but also because it was the last liturgy that Fr. Gary would be celebrating as our Pastor before he retires.  It is a beautiful service and I admit I did feel awkward at first because of all the bowing and “Triple Fake Air Kisses” but it winds up being a humbling and moving experience.  At the end of all the prayers, everyone forms a line and stands before Fr. Gary. He asks us for forgiveness and that is when we bow and do the “Fake Triple Air Kiss.” As I was standing in line, waiting for my turn, I couldn’t remember what you were supposed to say. Luckily, Halle James, my fellow catechumen, was in front of me and I asked her. She said the proper phrase was “God forgives and I forgive."

 

an example from Instagram what Forgiveness Vespers looks like

     It quickly became emotional because, Matushka Mary was crying. This would be her last service with the parish she’s been a member of for over twenty years. After we forgave each other, she gave me a big hug and said how happy she was for me that I was finally entering the Church. 

     I took notice of one man, who was there with his children, and he reminded me that, in Orthodoxy, although there are many traditions and (sometimes odd things to the Western mind) of doing things, Orthodoxy does not force a person to do things they are uncomfortable with.  For example, in Orthodoxy, you venerate an Icon by bowing and kissing the Icon but there are some people who will only bow. The man I spoke of, participated in the “Forgiveness Circle” but, instead of doing the “Fake Triple Air Kiss,” which really amounted to a hug, he shook people's hands and offered words of forgiveness. He was able to fully participate in the service but do so in the way he was comfortable with.  Many people in his position would have simply left before all the hugging started but, good for this man for participating. He certainly is a fine example to his children who were standing next to him. 

     The coffee hour followed and everyone got a chance to say goodbye to Father Gary and Matushka Mary. At one point, Father Gary came and sat next to me and we chatted a bit. He asked me about my wife’s journey, and I told him how she is really becoming alive in her faith and I gave an example of how she was relating to me that she was deeply moved when she read about the Apostle Jude and all his sufferings, all for the sake of Christ and proclaiming His Word.  I know I would love for Karen to be Orthodox (and she would love for me to be Catholic) but, for now, we are both happy that we are progressing towards Christ. 

     As we were talking, Chris, the choir director, made an announcement that the choir would like to sing some hymns in honor of Father Gary.  They started singing and it was , of course, beautiful. 

     Before I left to go home, I thanked Father Gary for all his Pastoral care over the years and he agreed to take a “selfie” with me. (Pictured above) the reason I had a smirk on my face was Father Gary asked as I took the picture, if I was going to turn this into some A.I. video- apparently, he has seen some of my rather silly work on Facebook.

     I gave a hug to Matushka Mary and she said she and her husband would try to come down for when I am baptized.  (although I think Bishop Michael will want me to be Christmated instead- but I’ll do whatever) We parted laughing because I referenced the time she joked with me, when I was very new to Orthodoxy that, I was sitting in the wrong place- reserved for Priests and their wives. You can read about that HERE

     There is supposed to be a major storm coming Sunday night into Monday, so it is up in the Air if the “Canon of St. Andrew” will be served on Monday.  If it is, I’ll see if I can give you my reflections in the form of another blog post.

      In the meantime, Happy Lent everyone! May we keep the Fast!

And So it Begins.....Becoming a Catechumen!

 

                           

As Father Gary said at the end of the Liturgy, "This isn't the first step towards being received into the Orthodox Church, but it is an important step." Today, along with Halle James who I met last night after Saturday night Vespers, I became a Catechumen in the Holy Orthodox Church.  This whole journey started years ago when I was exploring my Catholic roots, looking for something "deeper" than my affiliation with Evangelicalism.  I discovered Catholicsim on the internet (Shout out to Fr Roderick Vonhogen of the old Daily Breakfast podcast) which led me to other Catholic podcasts. On my particular one, I believe it was called "Techno Priest" (I can't be sure; it was back in 2008), that priest interviewed Fr. Peter Preble, who at the time had the Shepherd of Souls podcast, which was my first encounter with an Eastern Orthodox Podcast.  That reminded me that, at one time, I would visit an Eastern Orthodox Liturgy at the Base Chapel when I was in the Air Force back in 1980 (Chaplain Pelesh was the Orthodox Chaplain then and a really great guy, down to earth!) I had forgotten all about Orthodoxy and, at the time, I really didn't understand it. I just saw it as a weird Catholic offshoot.  

All this led me to Ancient Faith Radio and that changed my life.

Ancient Faith Home | Ancient Faith Ministries

After a while of listening (and learning) I got the nerve to visit an Orthodox Parish.  I was going to go to a Greek Parish, which was closest to me but a phone call to the Priest let me know that most of the liturgy was in Greek.  That didn't help me at all so I ventured to the OCA parish which I now attend and to which I hope to be united in communion as soon as God wills.  

My wife came to the parish (It was her first time) so she could witness me becoming a catechumen.  I knew she would like some of it (She remarked how the choir was beautiful (Shout out to Chris, our choir director! ☺) But I knew that the kissing of the Icons and all that bowing would be foreign to her (as it was to me when I first attended) But she was very happy for me and I am glad she was there. She could sense I was nervous and in her own way told me to calm down ("Jim, you're stressing me out!") God bless my wife!

 Here is a video of the ceremony (for lack of a better word) which Shana, whom I just met, filmed it.  (Quick note on how God cares about the little things in our life. Shana (not sure if I'm spelling her name right) told me normally she stands on the other side of the Nave but, someone else was in that spot so she was forced to be where she was which proved better because, she would not have been able to get me in the picture if she stood where she normally did.) 

After the service Fr. Gary welcomed me and Halle James as Catechumens and sang "Many Years" for us. Fr. Gary marks special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries with the singing of "Many Years" at the end of the Liturgy. Here is a video of that which concludes with me venerating the Cross.

I will be checking in from time to time, to let you know how my journey is going. Please keep me in your prayers. 

Making the Announcements/Seeing Orthodox Movies

 

Fr Bohdan making announcements

After all these years, it seems a little surreal that I am finally becoming Orthodox. But it has moved from the realm of wishing to becoming a reality. I even made the announcements in the bulletin.  Fr. Gary is away until next week so Fr. Bohdan Chaikivskyi (whose name I admit I cannot pronounce.) celebrated the Divine Liturgy and after the liturgy, Fr. Bohdan made the announcements.  Here is a video of him mentioning how I and someone else will be received as catechumens next week:

And here is how it looked in the Bulletin:

THIS SUNDAY, February 8 – Prior to the Divine Liturgy, James Vivanco and Halle James will be received into the catechumenate. May God continue to guide their journeys into the Orthodox Faith!

So, Next Sunday it is, then! I will be going to Vespers Saturday night so that I can speak with Fr. Gary to find out the specifics of what I am to do, ect.  Since I have never been received as a Catechumen before, I don't know what to do.  😁 I am happy that my wife will be witnessing the event. She will stop by before she goes to Mass.  

Moving Forward - Snowstorm prevented my attendance at my scheduled last Protestant Service.

A.I. Jimmy in the Snowstorm

Last Sunday would have been my last Sunday at my Protestant parish but the Pastor Cancelled the Service due to a bad snowstorm.  (Side note: My Orthodox Parish was open for business; must be those hardy Russian roots ☺) So instead of attending the protestant service, I helped them by editing an old service from YouTube-I took out the irrelevant announcements- and re-posting so they could "worship" together.  I guess that is my last act of service for the Protestants, at least as it pertains to Sunday Morning Worship. I checked the Stats and 76 of them did watch the service so my work wasn't for nothing.  Why didn't I go to the Orthodox Liturgy if the Church was open? I guess I am not as hardy as those Russians yet.  The Snowstorm was pretty bad.

I spent the morning typing up the attendance sheets for February so that the next Sunday School Superintendent can have an easy transition.  I will offer to help that person in telling them how I "do the Stats" if they want me to. (They chose a new Sunday School Superintendent in February) Perhaps, they will develop their own system. I know I needed the help when I took over the job. My friend James used to do it and he used the excel program.  I am not that proficient in that program, so I developed my own system. 

This Sunday is my first Sunday at the Orthodox Church, leaving the past behind.  I will have one week as "an inquirer," and then the next week, Fr. Gary receives me as a catechumen. It has been harder to leave protestant parish, -more than I realized. I think that is why I gave myself a transition period. But, my mind is now focused on starting life as an Orthodox Christian.  In my prayer rule for years, I would mention several Saints and ask them 

'"Lead me unto Christ and unto Holy Orthodoxy." 

I said this prayer for years, asking St. James, the brother of the Lord, St. Moses the Black, St. Herman of Alaska, St, Mary of Egypt. St. James the Faster.- I asked these Saints for Prayer because when I first inquired into Orthodoxy (more than a decade ago,) these Saints stood out to me as an example- I love their stories - I am grateful that after all these years, my prayers have been answered.  

To help me in my way back to Orthodoxy, I have decided to relisten to all of Fr. Thomas Hopko's podcast "Speaking the Truth in Love," on Ancient Faith Radio. There are over 250 episodes so that should keep me busy for a while. I am very grateful to AFR for all their podcasts; they are the reason I got the courage to walk into my parish.  One day, I'll do a blog post about AFR and go into detail on how they changed my life.

Speaking the Truth in Love | Ancient Faith Ministries

Well, that's it for now. Thanks for reading and keep me in your prayers. Hey, Great Lent is coming up....that should be fun!